Did you see that?!?

'Cuz I did!

24 plus hours after Lasik and I'm doing good!

Lauren took me to the surgery center yesterday morning, and we got there really, really early. My appointment was at 8:20 a.m. in Tysons. And you know how that goes -- it can take 25 minutes to get there or 2 hours to get there. So we left around 6:50 a.m., and it, of course, took us 25 minutes.

Poor Lauren. She was a really good sport, though, and we did some driving around trying to find a coffee shop open. We finally canned that idea (probably when Lauren perceptively realized I was so nervous I just wanted to be sitting in the waiting room, even if I was an hour early).

Once they took me back, everything went fairly quickly. The nurse reminds you of all the side effects. Gives you a million drops to take after the surgery, complete with a two-week check list to help you keep track. The doctor comes in and reminds you of all the side effects. He gives you a Xanax.

Actually, an aside on the doctor. He's a surgeon, and they are infamous for not having good bed side manners. This one wasn't very different. Although I did trip him up when I asked him when it would feel like when I left the surgery center -- would I be able to see, wouldn't I, what should I expect?

And he said that it would be like I dipped my contacts in jelly.

So I said, "Ok. But, um, I never dipped my contacts in jelly, so that's not really helpful."

Pause.

Complete silence.

(me, thinking: oh, great, Maureen, piss off the surgeon before he takes a laser to your eyes.)

"Hu. Huhuhuhu. Ha. Hahaha. Ya, I guess you wouldn't have," he says.

Whew.

He gave me the Xanax, turns out the lights and leaves me to rest. I'm sure I fell asleep, and then a nurse was in ushering me to the surgery room. I laid down on a bed, she gave me a teddy bear to hold on to, and they were off.

It was literally 30 seconds on each eye, under two different machines. It was surreal. I was nervous, but the Xanax did it's job. The doctor and nurse did a good job of counting down the time under each machine, which really helped. You can stand the discomfort when you know it's only 15 seconds longer.

The weirdest was when you knew he was pulling back your cornea and then replacing it. He used a mini paint brush to smooth it back out and that realization was freaky.

But then they're done. They sit you right up, look into your eyes. pull off your hair net, and lead you right out to the waiting room.

I had an early appointment, so I didn't see anyone finishing. But I imagine that's unsettling. I know I wasn't steady on my feet, and looked dazed. But, I guess I wasn't crying or hysterical or anything!

Lauren did great getting me to the car ("those are steps, Maureen, hold on," and, as we approached the car and she had to get her keys, "hold these books, stand here and don't move."). She drove me home and helped me get upstairs and read me the directions of which drops to put in before my nap.

Sidebar on getting home for the nap: Fridays is when our housekeeper comes. On top of the surgery concerns, I was anxious that I would come home and need to take the doctor's ordered nap (it's another reason they give you the Xanax -- the first three hours after have the most discomfort and they want you to sleep through it so you don't rub your eyes), and Merecedes would be in my room, bed striped and the vacuum running.

So I left her a note asking to hit up the master bedroom first. (Yes, I actually entered the note into Google translation. I felt really guilty about the request, so it was this five sentence explanation that I was having surgery and needed to nap and I was really sorry to ask, but would she mind...)

Well, the note worked. Because Mike was actually still sleeping when she got to our house. He was going to the Baltimore office and didn't have to be there until a late morning meeting. Merecedes knocked on our bedroom door, opened it, and told him he had to get out because she needed to do this room first for me.

My nap was a success and I woke up being able to see! I was still a little unsteady on my feet yesterday, and really cautious of my eyes. They were scratchy -- scratchier than I expected, although I'm not sure why I didn't expect them to be scratchy. But they improved by the hour, and continue to do so today.

I was cleared by the doc to drive (I had to go out to Reston for my one-day follow up. Drove 35 minutes each way for a 2 minute appointment), and typing on this computer isn't bothering my eyes at all (I all but went out of my skin last night because I wasn't supposed to go on the computer, and when I snuck a few minutes, I actually couldn't even keep focus on the screen.).

I'm about to gather up all my glasses and contact stuff and maybe build a fire in the backyard.

That'd be a sight to see.