My first weekend "out"

(April 18)

This was kinda my first weekend "out" about the pregnancy. Well, I guess not totally -- I told my siblings and aunts when I saw them a few weeks ago, and a few friends have known when I've hung out with them.

But this was my first weekend telling a bunch of people I wasn't close with, talking about it openly, and, well, frankly, taking advantage of every bit of sympathy and help I could get.

I was helping a friend on a cool project and it took me out of town. I spent the weekend with people I'd likely never see again, or who under no conceivable way could spread the word of my pregnancy back to work before I could (tomorrow, I hope, I can get some time to break the news. At this point, it's ridiculous.). So I felt no reservations coming clean when at lunch the first day, the three I was with ordered salads -- two of them vegan -- and I ordered stuffed grilled cheese (complete with thick Texas toast, two kinds of cheese, fried onions and avocado) and french fries. Or when, in a hot room, I moved the chair I was sitting in next to an open doorway for more air and someone joked (but not really) that we were going to get busted for breaking firecode and I said flatly, "let me deal with the firemen if they get here. I'm pregnant, I'm hot, and I'm hungry. And I'm not moving" (but I smiled afterwards). Or when I unabashedly just skipped out on planned group activities because I felt like napping instead.

I liked it. It was kind of nice. It was all, "I'm not really going to do something I don't want to do, and I don't care if I'm using this baby as an excuse. I'm using it."

I think I could get used to that part.